I saw my surgeon today.  I fucking gained 4 pounds since my last visit.  Yep.  Month 3 of my supervised diet and my fat ass gains.  Wonderful.  Anyhow, we discussed eating 1000 calories or under until my 2-week liver reduction diet, eating on smaller plates, and following the 20-20-20 rule.  It goes like this:  cut your food into 20 pieces, chew each piece 20 times, and wait 20 seconds between bites.  Also, we submitted to insurance for approval.  I should be more excited, but every time I get excited for something, it turns to shit.  So...I'm just cautiously optimistic.  I NEED to have this surgery to save my life.  I hope my insurance company can see that.  I have high blood pressure.  I have high cholesterol.  I have borderline high blood sugar.  I have PCOS and infertility.  I have back problems.  They have to see how much I need this.  I pray to God they see how much I need this.  This is it for me; my last shot at a normal life.  Without this, I die.

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