Self Image. And snacks!!

This entire weight loss journey has been so bizarre. When I began, all I could do was think and dream about how I'd look after dropping weight. I never considered how I'd feel. Sure, I thought I'd probably have more energy. I thought I'd probably have more energy. I never once expected that I'd still see myself as the same old morbidly obese person.

I thought I'd undergo this fantastic transformation; like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon. And in a sense, I have. My body has been transformed. I have a smaller ass. A leaner waist line. Slimmer hips. Hell, I have ankles now! But, I still see myself as the old me. The 368 pound me. Despite dropping 150 pounds, I cannot see myself as smaller. I have people telling me they can see it, and I STILL can't! I'm unsure why this is such a problem for me. Maybe it's because for 38 years, all I ever saw was the fat me, and I don't know any other way to see myself.

On to another topic - snacks! I had my one year follow up with my surgeon earlier this week (more on this topic tomorrow), and I had a lovely chat with the patient coordinator. We were discussing snacks. I don't like experimenting with snacks, or purchasing foods I've never tried, because 1) snacks can be expensive and 2) it feels like such a waste of money if I hate the item.  I posted awhile ago about the protein snacks I purchased, and I tried a new one with my lunch today.  

The product was Sea Salt and Vinegar "Protein Chips" by Health Wise.  I purchase those here:  AmBari Nutrition. I wasn't too sure how I felt about these upon first bite. But I ate a second. And then a third. And then yes, this entire snack size bag. And I have to say, they were really good. I would normally feel guilty, except, I didn't. And, it was 10 grams of protein for these. It definitely satisfied my chips craving, guilt free. You can check out the nutrition and ingredients labels below.

  

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A Review: Tasty Bites Party Mix

Sooooooo, in my never-ending protein quest, this weekend I spent some time on a few web sites searching for some protein-rich snacks, meant specifically for bariatric patients. One web site I found, AmBari Nutrition had several tasty tidbits I ordered. I was probably most excited to try this snack from Robard, Tasty Bites Party Mix.  It comes in pizza flavor or the party mix flavor. I haven't had Chex Mix in a long long LONG time and figured what the hell, how bad can it be?  Here's the photo from the web site:

And here is the item out of the bag. You can see how HUGE these things are.  When you open the bag, they smell just like Chex Mix, which was important. And I could immediately taste the seasoning and Worcestershire, which is important. I ate one and my first thought was oh yea, score! And then I ate a few more. Aaaaaand, decided they're not for me.

First, the good. The portion is freakin huge. These would be a slider for me I think, so I think I could probably eat them all, but then again who knows. If you miss having a big snack to really sink your teeth into, this'll work for you.  

Nutritionally? Not horrible.  For the whole bag, you'll give up 140 calories.  There's 20g of carbs but 10g of protein.  I like that.  

Here's the ingredients:

Potato Starch, Soy Protein Concentrate, Vegetable Oil (Contains one of more of the following: Mid or High Oleic Sunflower Seed Oil, High Oleic Canola Oil), Pea Fiber, Maltodextrin, Sugar, Salt, Worcestershire Sauce (Vinegar, Molasses, Corn Syrup, Salt, Caramel Color, Garlic Powder, Sugar, Spices, Tamarind, Natural Flavor), Garlic Powder, Yeast Extract, Onion Powder, Natural Flavors, Vinegar, Spices. 

I could definitely taste the potato starch. A few bites were all I could do though; I'm not sure if it was the flavor or the texture, but I just didn't fall in love with these.  I would definitely try the pizza flavor to see if those are any better.  

Would I buy these again? Doubt it. My husband loves them though, so he's eating the bag right now.  Out of 10 stars, this snack is going to get a 5.  It's not awful, but not my first choice. If I was craving something like party mix, I'd feel better reaching for this, that the calorie laden real deal.

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Let's Talk About Protein...

Oh, there's that "P" word again. You know the one. PROTEIN.

Protein is something that I sometimes struggle with. I don't always want it. Sometimes I want fruit, or anything, really. Just...well, not protein. But, I'm striving to become a better me, and have really upped my activity level, so it's time to up the protein quotient.  This weekend I ordered a shit-ton of samples and here's what's on my list to try in the coming days:

HealthSmart Protein Chips - Sea Salt and Vinegar
Oh Yeah! Ready to Drink in Chocolate Milkshake flavor
Kay's Naturals Protein Pretzel Sticks
Celebrate - ENS Multivitamin, Calcium and Protein shake - Chocolate Milk flavor
Chike Protein shake - Chocolate Bliss flavor
Double Potato Bites - Cheddar Cheese flavor
Tasty Bites - Party Mix
HealthSmart Protein Chips - Pizza Crunch
Crunch O's in Sour Cream and Onion, and BBQ flavors
Big Train No Sugar Added Mocha Latte
Caveman Foods Spicy BBQ Chicken Jerky
Nectar in Wild Grape
About Time Protein Shake - Mocha Mint flavor

I will post photos and reviews of every single item I try, along with links where you can also purchase these goodies :)

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Product Review: Quest Protein Bar - Apple Pie

In my never-ending "Quest" (ha!!) to find the perfect protein source, I stumbled upon these bars.  I had read a lot of reviews and posts about them over at Obesity Help.  I thought, well, if so many people like these, they must be good.  Of course, that same line of thinking is why I have a tub of Unjury collecting dust in my kitchen.  But I digress.  This bar was a much less expensive investment to try.

First of all, I love apple pie.  Cold, room temperature, heated...I don't discriminate.  I love it.  So I was the most excited to try this flavor.  I have a few other flavors to try, but this one...this one was gonna be money, I just knew it.

Apparently, there are only 6 non-fiber grams of carbs in these bars.  I still don't have a firm grasp on carbs -vs- net carbs, and in My Fitness Pal, I count all carbs.  But, I do feel better knowing that truly, I did not consume 24g of carbs in eating this bar.

The first thing that I noticed about the bar is how dense it is.  It's really chewy, and well, dense.  I've heard that you can microwave it for a few seconds and it's supposed to be heavenly.  That's something I'll have to try next time.  I was already logged into work on my lap top and honestly, too lazy to get up and heat it.  Besides, I was enjoying it as is.  So, it's dense and chewy.  But then, oh.my.gosh...yes!  Real pieces of apple!  It was a nice change from the typical protein bar that's coated in a nasty-ass faux chocolate.  There's none of that here.  

This bar gets a 9 out of 10.  For sure.  This will be my go-to bar of choice.  It was refreshing with the apple, and you definitely cannot argue with 20g of protein.  Very good flavor, no funky smell, no funky aftertaste.  This one is definitely a winner and will for sure be going into my protein bar rotation.

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Product Review: Power Crunch Protein Energy Bar

I really struggle with the protein some days.  I have issues with the protein shakes.  The main issue is they make me gag.  I just can't get them down.  Once I smell them, it's all over.  And I know the trick about drinking out of a cup with a lid so you don't smell it.  But let's be honest...you smell it.  The other problem I have is that my taste buds change literally day to day.  I bought a tub of Unjury after my surgery, and drank it two or three times with no problem what so ever.  Now?  I cannot even stand to look at my tub, because the taste just nauseates me soooooo badly.  

So, I struggle with getting in enough protein.  I decided to give protein bars a go, and see if maybe I can replace a meal or snack with one of these, to boost my protein a bit.  Today my son and I made a wee trip to the Vitamin Shoppe to suss out their selection of protein bars.  I walked out with 10 bars to try, and yes, I'm going to be one of those people who writes about them here.  

First on deck?  This baby.  Power Crunch protein energy bar, in peanut butter fudge flavor.  The package makes it looks really delicious; sort of reminds me of a nutty bar, and those things are like crack to me.  Soooo flippin good.  There's just something about chocolate, peanut butter and wafers that hits the sweet spot.  

Obviously, that's what appealed the most to me; the look of the bar on the package and the advertised flavors.  I've gotta tell you, it's certainly no nutty bar, but I don't hate it.  There is ZERO funky protein smell, so no stomach turning feelings here.  That's huge.  The flavors and texture are nice.  There is real peanut butter, at least according to the ingredient label, but I feel like that flavors gets lost by the faux chocolate coating on the bar.  The bar is nice and crispy and it breaks down into a nice texture while you chew.  Despite it not being real chocolate, or lacking some strong peanut butter flavor, this bar is pretty good.  I would definitely eat it again, and that is saying a lot.

Overall, I'd have to rate this bar a 7 out of 10.  It's not something I'd crave, necessarily, but it did the job.  I got 13 grams of protein which isn't exactly high, it did what I needed it to do...give me a little boost.  I will definitely be trying the other flavors that this bar comes in.  Those flavors include:  Triple Chocolate, French Vanilla Creme, Peanut Butter Creme, Cookies and Creme and Wildberry Creme.

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Chicken "Muffins"

If there is one thing you should know about me, it's that I'm completely, utterly, hopelessly addicted to Pinterest.  I find THE coolest shit there.  From recipes, to crafts, to..well..everything!  

Last night I was looking at low carb food, and came across these chicken muffins.  I made them for dinner tonight and they were soooo good.

Here is the recipe, for the curious...

• 1 lb. ground chicken
• 2 egg whites
• 1/2 cup quick cook oats
• 1/4 tsp ground cumin
• 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
• 1/4 tsp chili powder
• 1/2 tsp black pepper
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1 clove minced garlic
• 1/2 small onion, chopped
• Shredded part skim mozzarella cheese

1. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees
2. Spray a non-stick cupcake pan with your nonstick spray
3. Mix all ingredients together in a bowl, minus the cheese.
4. Roll into balls, and put into your cupcake pan
5. Put a pinch of cheese on top of each ball (I probably used 2 tbsp. in total, for all 12 muffins)

Bake for 40 minutes.  Chow down.

A serving size for a male is 4 of these, and 2 for a female.  I could only eat 1 1/2 of them, a month out of my VSG.

I ran these through My Fitness Pal, and here's what I got, calling a serving 2 muffins...

168 calories
6g carbs
8g fat
25g protein
106g sodium
1g sugar

I didn't think it was too bad.  The muffins are really good; lots of flavor and spice.  I'd like to cut down on the spiciness next time (it gives me wicked heartburn/indigestion), and add some shredded carrots and zucchini to the mixture.  You can add more cheese on top, but I'm not a big cheese fan so that's why I went so light on it.

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Meals

What a difference a few weeks makes.  I'm talking about pre-op versus post-op meals. My very last meal before my pre-op diet?  It was from Five Guys.  It was a delicious, greasy fat-laden  double bacon cheeseburger, with lettuce, tomato, mayo and ketchup, and a regular french fry.  Oh, and a large Diet Coke.

I will be the very first to admit.  Sometimes, I REALLY miss eating shit like this.  I do.  French Fries are probably my biggest vice on the face of the planet.  And I'm sorry, but probably the only thing better than a bacon cheeseburger is pizza.

I am bringing this up now because today for lunch, I had a cheeseburger.  But it's not what you think.

First, let's discuss the "nutrition" in the above meal, shall we?

Bacon Cheeseburger

• 920 calories (gross!!)
• 62 grams of fat (can we say clogged arteries??)
• 180 mg of cholesterol (no wonder I was on Lipitor!!)
• 1310 mg of sodium (and 2 blood pressure medications)
• 40g carbs
• 51g protein

Regular Fries

• 953 calories (more calories than my burger...and this one time, I got the regular size, not my standard large!!)
• 41 grams of fat
• 962 mg of sodium
• 131g carbs
• 15g protein

Large Diet Coke

Wow.  That's quite the meal huh?   1873 mother-fucking calories.  I mean really.  Was that necessary?  But that's how I ate.  ALL of the time.  Like, every meal was an event for me.  I'd go to Tim Horton's for breakfast and get a BLT bagel with a large iced mocha latte.  Or, I'd go to Chipotle for dinner and order a burrito bowl with double rice, and double meat and get the chips and salsa for a snack after dinner.  Of course, I'd wash that all down with a few Diet or Cherry Cokes.  And let's not forget about the standard Hershey bar for dessert. 

Well duh.  No wonder I got so big.  I look back now and I'm just disgusted.  It plays in my mind like a bad book.  You ever see those shows with the really large obese people and they talk about how much they eat and you can't help but feel disgusted because it seems like so much?  Yea.  Well, try taking stock of what you do eat, or used to eat and I promise, the eyes will fly wide open!

So back to today's lunch.  My cheeseburger.  I made turkey burgers for the boys, and I wanted one too, since they're on my list of soft foods.  Mine was sans bun, which I did not miss at all.  I melted a Weight Watchers cheese single on top, and dipped my bites into 1/2 tablespoon of ketchup.  I was able to finish 2/3 of my burger.  Here's what my meal weighed in at:

2/3 Jennie-O Turkey Burger

• 130 calories
• 7 grams of fat
• 0 carbs
• 18 grams of protein

2/3 slice Weight Watchers Cheese Single

• 20 calories
• 2 grams of fat
• 1g carbs
• 3g protein

150 calories for a meal, compared to 1873.  And after the meal I had today, I don't feel sick to my stomach or so stuffed that all I can do is lie on my couch for a few hours to let it digest.  Because after my last meal, I was stuffed.  I literally couldn't move off of my couch that night, because of how packed I was.

But today, I feel satisfied, not stuffed.  And the burger was DELICIOUS.

I love my sleeve!!

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